Why Therapy in Your Mother Tongue Matters

Language is not only a means of communication; it is the foundation of our psychological and cultural world. Jacques Lacan, a renowned French psychoanalyst, described language as the point at which a child enters the shared social world of words, meanings and rules. This is where needs and desires must be expressed in words rather than preverbal sensations and images. This shift is central to psychological development, but it also comes with a cost.

The Origins of Language and Repression

Before speech, infants experience the world through sensations and images. Learning to speak requires translating these early experiences into words that parents and the broader society understand. This process also introduces the child to the social boundaries embedded in language – the “rules” of what can and cannot be said. In other words, we learn not only to speak but also what not to speak. It is here that repression begins to take root.

In psychoanalytic theory, repression refers to the unconscious blocking of thoughts, feelings, or desires that conflict with one’s developing sense of self or social expectations. These experiences are not erased but stored out of awareness, often returning indirectly through dreams, slips of the tongue, or psychological symptoms such as anxiety and depression. When, as adults, we encounter distress that feels inexplicable, this can sometimes be the “return of the repressed” – feelings or experiences that were pushed out of awareness and left unprocessed. The task of talking therapy is to make space for these experiences to be spoken about and to help find words and understanding for them.

Language and Emotional Connection in Therapy

For those who speak more than one language, the emotional landscape can be even more complex, as emotional responses may differ depending on the language used. A second language often engages more cognitive and analytical processing, while the mother tongue tends to evoke more embodied and emotional reactions. In therapy, this can mean that speaking in one’s mother tongue enables a deeper connection to early experiences, feelings, and cultural contexts. At the same time, using a second language may sometimes provide distance or a sense of safety that allows clients to approach painful or sensitive topics more gradually.

From a therapeutic perspective, both languages have value. What matters most is awareness and flexibility. For multilingual clients and practitioners, staying curious about how language shapes meaning can itself become part of the therapeutic work, for example, when and why a particular language is chosen in the session.

A Final Comment

Everyone’s linguistic and cultural journey is unique. Some clients may feel more at ease in English, others in Arabic, and many naturally switch between the two. The role of therapy is to make space for this fluidity, encouraging curiosity and recognising the individual’s lived experience rather than enforcing one way of speaking.